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STAGE MANAGER:

We were ready to go hours ago

Yep plenty of time for another dress rehearsal

The comms are working perfectly

That scene change worked well

Thanks… but as you know “I Don’t Drink”

SET DESIGNERS:

That worked out exactly as we planned it

It could be our fault we got the colours wrong… nothing to do with the lighting

You might well be right about the way it looks

So many helpers… so much time

Thanks… but as you know “I don’t drink”

STAGE CREW:

We’ll be in first thing in the morning

Set designers are such understanding people

What a fantastic show this is

Of course you’re not in the way

Thanks… but as you know “I don’t drink”

DIRECTOR/PRODUCER:

The show is running within budget!

The stage crew are such understanding people!

The orchestra are a little too quiet!

That scene change didn’t work too well!

Thanks… but as you know “I don’t drink”

THE ORCHESTRA:

We’re not too loud the cast are too quiet

The drummer is just being himself

What time does the bar open?

What do you mean there is no bar???

The drinks are on us!!!

LIGHTING:

If you don’t like the gels we put in we can change them all

It’s ok stand there we’ll move the light to spot you

All lights ordered are here and working

Oh bother… the lighting PC has just crashed

Thanks… but as you know… I have to get to bed early tonight

SOUND:

This buildings acoustics are great

If there isn’t room for me I can manage to do the sound from the car park

Such wonderful voices… so easy to mix

Dosen’t the bar have a wonderful selection of drinks and at such reasonible prices!

Thanks… but as you know… oh go on then!

THE ACTOR:

Maybe my big scene should be cut a little? What do you think?

No please… lets not talk about me and my part.

I love the costume… it makes me look so tall and slim

Thats ok I can do that myself

I’d like to say a big big thankyou to my fellow cast members, makeup, lights, sound, and stage crew… without them the show would not go on and I would not look and sound so wonderful. Enough about me… drinks all round!!! But before I go… Mr Stage manager what time would you like me to come and help clean up in the morning???

Submitted by Joe Mitchell from Soundhire. Soundhire is a small theatrical sound and special effects company. They supply equipment for hire and sales to amateur and professional theatre users.